For The Ladies, If She Ever Comes Back

“For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ‘Put down the Hammer’ or ‘Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’, or are you just picking on us?” — Wendi Aarons, former Always maxi pad user in a letter to Proctor & Gamble, posted at Demure Thoughts.

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17 Responses to For The Ladies, If She Ever Comes Back

  1. Lemur King says:

    “I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.”

    – and –

    “an inbred hillbilly with knife skills”

    Awesome. Just plain awesome. The second one is true.

    I also call PMS “Mad Cow Disease”.

  2. I get a kick out of women ragging about ragtime!

    That came out wrong.

    They sound just like us men when our lawnmowers are misbehaving on a scorching hot summer day. Pissed, irritable, and eventually becoming totally irrational. (and with good reason!)

  3. Lemur King says:

    Eventually becoming totally irrational? Let’s try irrational right out of the gate.

  4. LK – I was being PC in case our one lady takes (understandable) offense at my implicit (but unintended) Chauvinism.

    I had read many, many years ago (shit – it was decades ago!) That if you forced a males hormones (all of ’em – not just the primary ones) to cycle exactly the way a typical woman’s do on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis, that a) he’s be deeply neurotic or borderline psychotic within three months, and b) he’d be dead within a year.

    We guys ain’t built to take that kind of chemical knocking around. No wonder it knocks ’em off-kilter.

  5. Lemur King says:

    Was that a serious study or are you fucking with me?

    • To answer your question: yes, it was presented as a serious study. I was a bit dubious at the time (and still am) but learned nothing further. I have also tried to track it down since then, to no avail. It was in a print magazine that (if memory serves) I was reading in either a Dr. or dentists office around the time of the early ’80’s – ’81 or ’82 I think. But I’ll be damned if I’ve ever found it again.

  6. Lemur King says:

    Under “hormone replacement therapy” (wiki-frickin’-pedia)

    “Recent studies have indicated that cross-hormone therapy in transwomen may result in a reduction in brain volume towards female proportions.”

    Here there be dragons…

  7. Lemur King says:

    You know, that was (IMHO) perfect Sith Dragon trolling-bait material, and nary a nibble.

    I would have expected the stomping of a lifetime – worse than the classical D&D Red Dragon stomping given to those intrepid adventurers who gather their party, set forth, and do something really stupid (around a Red Dragon, of course).

  8. Well, well, well….imagine my surprise when I find a message in my inbox asking timidly (yes, timidly) if I were offended by a certain post here. Naturlich I come running to the blog (which I am sorry to say I have neglected the past few days. I will have my account up and running hopefully this afternoon!) and find that the gentlemen are discussing things of a female nature.

    And all of which are true.

    Now, I am not inbred, but yes, I am a hillbilly with knife skills at all times, so I can’t vouch for that quote. I can, however, vouch for the “mad cow disease” LK has so eloquently used. All that being said, I would wager that most women choose to let the rage take over for those few days. Why do I say this? Simple: BECAUSE IT CAN BE CONTROLLED!!! I DO IT ALL THE TIME!!! To put it in milder terms, gentlemen, you are being had.


    • C Monster says:

      Glad you finally made it…and found my little present.

      And for making this the new clubhouse leader for longest thread–Woot!

  9. Lemur King says:

    Timidly. Yes. Because Mad Cow Disease is a silent killer, and one must walk with caution around silent killers.

    I don’t know about “being had” as much as “consuming a steady diet of self-preservation”. In one case the onus is on the knife-skilled hillbilly, the other, the onus is on the once-stabbed-twice-shy avoidance-motivated would-be victim.

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